Frequently Asked Questions
about

Sex, Intimacy & Embodiment Coaching

 

FAQ

Should I hire a therapist or a coach?

Coaching and therapy are very compatible. They just do different things. Coaching is generally more present/future focused and therapy is usually more past-focused. Many clients (and I myself) have both a coach and therapist. If you want to focus on understanding your past — the reasons behind your emotions and reactions, and your childhood wounds, you should absolutely find and hire a good therapist (be picky!). If you have or suspect you have mental or emotional illnesses, such as depression, severe anxiety, and/or PTSD, I also recommend working with a therapist, especially one who specializes in EMDR, IFS (internal family systems), and/or CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy). 

If you want to focus on the present and the future — developing skills to enable a bigger, better life — then a good coach is often a better fit (again, be picky!). The type of coaching I do is practice-oriented. We actually practice real relational and intimacy skills, which you will not get in talk therapy. Most therapists are frankly not trained around sex and definitely will not do relational practice with clients. This type of practice will give you the confidence you need to take these skills into your relationships. 

Therapy is also often longer-term. My clients typically work with me for relatively short periods (6 months to a year). Then they graduate with us both thrilled because they got huge transformations. I also have some clients who only need a few sessions to address a specific problem and they are good to go. Coaching is results-oriented. So I am focused on you getting what you came for as soon as possible. 

Is it worth the investment? 

It depends. What is your own erotic liberation worth to you? What is living the whole rest of your life with access to more pleasure and connection than you ever thought possible worth to you? You are always in control of deciding what you want to invest in. I invite you to consider investing in yourself, and prioritizing your own pleasure and enjoyment in yourself over commodities (stuff). You are worth it. 

For me, owning my full pleasure, body confidence, and power to have authentic, sustainable relationships is worth everything. It’s worth so much more than stuff like cars, booze, and clothes that are marketed to us by advertisers (as if these things had power to change our feelings. They don’t.) You’re the only one who can make you feel empowered and joyful. No commodity can do that. You will learn how using practical skills that I learned and will teach you.

You’ll have that forever. No one can ever take it away from you. To me, that’s worth way more than a fancy car (and luckily, I charge less than that anyway). The level of investment will depend on what your unique goals are and where you’re starting (which will determine how many sessions will get you there). We can talk all this over in a free consultation. 

Will it work for me?

You are unique, but you’re also human. The tools I teach work for all humans. Maybe there’s an exception out there, but we (my teachers and the thousands of people they have helped with these methods) have not found one yet. As long as you commit to show up and do the practice with your whole heart, these methods will also work for you. Step one is believing in your own potential for change. That’s the hardest part and no one can do it for you. 

Is it hard work? 

Nope. It’s actually really enjoyable. I will guide you. Sometimes tough emotions will come up and I will support you in processing them. That can be a little challenging, but in a way that brings relief.  You don’t need to do anything but show up to our sessions with an open mind and a willingness to try. I am not a “tough” coach because that doesn’t work with these topics. We will go gently, respecting your boundaries and mine. There is only homework if you choose it, and you will make great progress whether you do it or not (maybe just at a slightly slower pace). 

What does a session look like? Are there rules?

Sessions are either in-person or over Zoom (video online). Both work really well. You can see some example in-person Somatica sessions with other practitioners here. All sessions are clothes-on, with no kissing on the mouth and no genital contact. Beyond that, we work within our boundaries of the day both yours and mine, which can change based on how we feel and our familiarity with each other. 

What does a session look like? Are there rules?

Sessions are geared towards your personal growth areas, so they look different, depending on where we are at in the arc of your growth. Sessions are either in-person or over Zoom (video online). Both work really well.

You can see some example in-person Somatica sessions with other practitioners here.
Somatica sessions are very different and much more intimate than therapy or other forms of coaching!

All sessions are clothes-on, with no kissing on the mouth and no genital contact. Those are the hard, indisputable boundaries. Beyond that, we work within our boundaries of the day — both yours and mine, which can change based on client needs and our familiarity with each other. 

If you have other questions, please feel free to contact me by email. 

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