If you want to last longer in bed, the stopwatch is probably not your biggest problem. Most men who orgasm faster than they want to are carrying performance anxiety, and it shows up as tension in the pelvic floor, tension in the whole body, and a habit of pulling away from the person they're with.
Here's the thing. When researchers asked women whose partners came quickly what distressed them most, the top answer was not how fast it happened. It was his lack of attention and his focus on his own performance. This episode is for men who come faster than they want to, and for the partners who love them.
In this episode:
- Why partners are usually upset about the shame and the withdrawal, not the clock, and what research says about average time to orgasm
- How anxiety, pelvic floor tension, and old masturbation habits train your body to orgasm fast
- A five-minute breath and pelvic floor practice, plus how to slow down and ride the waves in self-pleasure
- What to say to your partner, whether you're the one struggling with PE or the one who's partner is struggling
- How to take the pressure off tonight, before any practice has time to work
- Where cock rings, positions, and medication fit, and when to see a doctor
Lasting longer is worth working on. But staying present and engaged with your partner, whether you've orgasmed or not, is what your partner will remember, and that part you can start right now.
Topics: how to last longer in bed, lasting longer, performance anxiety men, premature ejaculation, early ejaculation, pelvic floor exercises for men
Get my free guide: Get Out of Your Head: A Starter Guide to Releasing the Pressure, Shame, and “Shoulds” Around Intimacy at https://laurajurgens.com/guide
More links:
Substack at https://laurajurgens.substack.com/
Wheel of Erotic emotions, go to: https://laurajurgens.com/wheel
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